PTSD and Me

[Furyan66]

Hey Stealth38

I have had quite a few good psychologist's. One especially I liked as he would always tell me after a couple years of talking that "I am aware of my issues and facing them but sometimes when a father's heart is broken because of an issue with a child, not all broken heart mend.

I would challenge any father with a good heart to see how they would handle having their 2 year old daughter that you helped to raise from birth to have her taken from you and moved without permission 350 miles away. It's exactly what he said. A broken Heart that did not heal because i never had the chance to see her to see her grow up. I can NEVER have what I really want in this lifetime and that is to be a full time parent and see her grow up full time but those years have passed.

I have my dreams though

Peace Alll

Fury

[reilli]

I hope you are able to find some relief Fury, I worry about you.

[Furyan66]

I hope you are able to find some relief Fury, I worry about you.

Hey reilli,

Thanks I appreciate your concern..

I am doing pretty well. I have been lucky lately and been able to get some time off work and attend a couple of great events with the eclipse at an Ozzy concert and a Stock Car race this past weekend are always therapeutic....

Gonna keep fighting this thing and it might bring me down sometimes but I'll be damned if I am going to let it get the best of me..

Thanks again my friend for caring

Fury

[reilli]

Glad to hear you're doing better and having some fun.

Take care and keep us posted.

[Melissa]

I want to write to say something but i do not know wht to say.

[Furyan66]

I want to write to say something but i do not know wht to say.

Hi Melissa..

No worries just be yourself. Just you posting and reading this thread says something that you took the time. This forum is a LOT more than an IOP and one of the first places in the past decade where I am actually opening up and sharing what is going on with me and PTSD hoping others with the same issue could benefit from knowing what I go through and the support I get back is priceless..

Thanks Melissa, Just posting shows you care...

Peace

Fury

[Furyan66]

Greeting All and a Merry Christmas to Everyone..

I haven't posted here in a while but wanted to bump this back up to the top for new members who might have similar issues.

The last few months for me I thought would be bad around the holidays but this year I have had to focus my attention elsewhere. I have another thread going about Killer Fentanyl and my first hand experience. I have been Trying to help out my girlfriend as much as posible who lost her son 6 weeks or so back due to this killer fentanyl has made me realize that even with PTSD, I HAVE NO PROBLEMS compared to what she is going through now especially during the holidays..

Peace All and have a safe holiday

Fury

[Furyan66]

Greeting All and a Merry Christmas to Everyone..

I haven't posted here in  a while but wanted to bump this back up to the top for new members who might have similar issues.

The last few months for me I thought would be bad around the holidays but this year I have had to focus my attention elsewhere. I have another thread going about Killer Fentanyl and my first hand experience. I have been Trying to help out my girlfriend as much as posible who lost her son 6 weeks or so back due to this killer fentanyl has made me realize that even with PTSD, I HAVE NO PROBLEMS compared to what she is going through now especially during the holidays..

Peace All and have a safe holiday

Fury

Such a heartbreaking post to read of yours regarding the Fentanyl. 

I think many of us in this family are carrying many diagnoses such as PTSD. My diagnosis for this came in 2014, I wasn't expecting it, I was already carrying other diagnoses of mental health issues. 

I have come to the conclusion that this is more widespread than people think. I was listening to a radio station where they were discussing the tragic fire outbreak at Grenfield Tower in the United Kingdom where approx 80 people lost there lives this year. The mental health services were explaining that they have been working extensively in the community to offer support to all, survivors as well as residents of the area. 

I was taken back by the figure of 70% of those with whom they worked with have been diagnosed with PTSD. This clearly shows that many people in life must be out there with traumas that are undiagnosed and without help on there own. 

I hope that there will be a big push in support as well as a plan of action around the world to reach out more to all sufferers of mental health issues.

Hey slipmat... Thanks again for reading..

PTSD is no joke. I consider myself a pretty mentally strong person and if 15 years ago you would have told me I'd be suffering from PTSD I would have laughed. It is a problem I fight everyday but I have learned to fight it on my terms with medication, meditation and other relaxing and mind focusing techniques.

STRESS WILL KILL YOU FASTER THAN ANYTHING IF YOU LET IT!!!

Not going to get the best of me and  will power through the bad days.

Life is a gift and I am not going to waste it..

Peace All

Fury

[Blockhead59]

I want to write to say something but i do not know wht to say.

Hi Melissa, thanks for being honest and letting others in. Sometimes I do not know what to say either and do not want to come across as a phony or someone who's trying too hard, or just someone pathetic. But, if I don't try, I'm all of those things anyway. I read a book called Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway, a while back, and kind of use that as my mantra now. 

Sometimes it works, like now. Other times, I'm still stuck in a holding pattern. I just keep trying. I'm sure you have things to share that would be beneficial to others and to yourself .
Thanks again.

---

Greeting All and a Merry Christmas to Everyone..

I haven't posted here in  a while but wanted to bump this back up to the top for new members who might have similar issues.

The last few months for me I thought would be bad around the holidays but this year I have had to focus my attention elsewhere. I have another thread going about Killer Fentanyl and my first hand experience. I have been Trying to help out my girlfriend as much as posible who lost her son 6 weeks or so back due to this killer fentanyl has made me realize that even with PTSD, I HAVE NO PROBLEMS compared to what she is going through now especially during the holidays..

Peace All and have a safe holiday

Fury

Such a heartbreaking post to read of yours regarding the Fentanyl. 

I think many of us in this family are carrying many diagnoses such as PTSD. My diagnosis for this came in 2014, I wasn't expecting it, I was already carrying other diagnoses of mental health issues. 

I have come to the conclusion that this is more widespread than people think. I was listening to a radio station where they were discussing the tragic fire outbreak at Grenfield Tower in the United Kingdom where approx 80 people lost there lives this year. The mental health services were explaining that they have been working extensively in the community to offer support to all, survivors as well as residents of the area. 

I was taken back by the figure of 70% of those with whom they worked with have been diagnosed with PTSD. This clearly shows that many people in life must be out there with traumas that are undiagnosed and without help on there own. 

I hope that there will be a big push in support as well as a plan of action around the world to reach out more to all sufferers of mental health issues.

Hey slipmat... Thanks again for reading..

PTSD is no joke. I consider myself a pretty mentally strong person and if 15 years ago you would have told me I'd be suffering from PTSD I would have laughed. It is a problem I fight everyday but I have learned to fight it on my terms with medication, meditation and other relaxing and mind focusing techniques.

STRESS WILL KILL YOU FASTER THAN ANYTHING IF YOU LET IT!!!

Not going to get the best of me and  will power through the bad days.

Life is a gift and I am not going to waste it..

Peace All

Fury

Hello Fury, 

First let me express my deepest sympathies for your and your girlfriend's loss of her son. I cannot imagine the pain, the shock, the emptiness, the fullness and the torture of such pain. I am so sorry. 

As to PTSD, somebody, like yourself, can experience PTSD simply by witnessing the grief that your girlfriend is going through, as well as your own grieving process. Trauma doesn't care about your event, it just wants to gaslight you into thinking you don't have it or you can handle it yourself. I was diagnosed with PTSD about 30 years after my Dad died. I was a little child. But, no one told me he had died. I eventually just figured it out. And, so, I just cruzed on until one day a therapist said you have never dealt with the trauma you experienced. She also informed me how PTSD is sometimes physically so draining, that your body/muscles are constantly fatigued, making your body hurt. Also, many with PTSD are on hyperdrive, always waiting to pounce or waiting for the other shoe to drop. Because of this constant state of arousal, the adrenal gland is producing so much cortisol that it becomes depleted (hence the GNCs of the world pushing adrenal supplement like mad). I had and still have occassionally bouts of severe flu-like body pain that are still a "mystery" to me. For instance, if I spend a lot of time with sibs and step-sibs, I am physically sick for two days after. I finally figured out they were triggering my same response mechanisms I was using back in the day to deal with my trauma. It's all a learning process.

I hope this was helpful in someway and am sending prayers, thoughts, energy, light and love to you and your girlfriend's families.

[Quest4Peace]

Good Sunday All... Things still been going pretty good controlling all the Anxiety and even been doing better at getting out of this shell and actually socializing more. Always will be a struggle but just remember when you feel the anxiety coming on just take a deep breath and refocus your thoughts to that "special place of peace" in your mind everyone has one and concentrate on your breathing. Most people who don't suffer from PTSD breath and dont even think about it. PTSD sufferers have to control your breathing otherwise anxiety can turn into a full blown panic attack and those are one of the worst things I have ever went through. Breathing, Controlling your thoughts and you have to be one tough minded person to fight through this but you can..

Each person has to find their own way and some doctors don't always know best.

My daughter recently gave me a couple Salt Lamp Crystals that I have incorporated in to my meditation and after taking a few nights to get used to the diferent glow at night, I have now learned to love em

This is a link to another thread that has good info about Anxiety
http://ioplist.org/showthread.php?tid=2389

Salt Lamps Link
http://ioplist.org/showthread.php?tid=29...light=salt

Hope you are doing well mboxfrogger and dancing wolf, remember you are not alone. My PM door is open

my mother swears by these steam releasers that you drop essential oils into... i'm really more of a visceral person and i usually need some sort of proff something is working or will work but at the very least it's neutral and  could argue the point that if you use it (many essential oils are very pleasant smelling to spread through your living space) when you are calm you could create a neural connection there.

on another note, the worst thing i've noticed about my PTSD, after my 'frozen' period where i mostly felt nothing is that your average panic attack which is nothing to sneeze at could, given the right circumstances (for some reason sunday late nights going into monday mornings are a concern/trigger point for me) i go through this... total breakdown where a bed of general anxiety and fear is laid down and the smallest thing will set off a panic attack. these episodes will last for 4-5 hours and i could easily have 2,3,4 panic attacks an hour in that time. I find the weirdest things to latch on to to hold on to my sanity (running sink water, sitting in a chair i normally don't sit in, pacing because to sit down will trigger another panic attack, running warm water over my hands or feet) this type of stuff really makes me feel crazy and is a fresh new hell in my battles with mental health. Anyone have experiences with this?

YES...HELL YES I DO! You couldn't have summed it up better when you said.......

"on another note, the worst thing i've noticed about my PTSD, after my 'frozen' period where i mostly felt nothing is that your average panic attack which is nothing to sneeze at could, given the right circumstances (for some reason sunday late nights going into monday mornings are a concern/trigger point for me) i go through this... total breakdown where a bed of general anxiety and fear is laid down and the smallest thing will set off a panic attack. these episodes will last for 4-5 hours and i could easily have 2,3,4 panic attacks an hour in that time. I find the weirdest things to latch on to to hold on to my sanity (running sink water, sitting in a chair i normally don't sit in, pacing because to sit down will trigger another panic attack, running warm water over my hands or feet) this type of stuff really makes me feel crazy and is a fresh new hell in my battles with mental health"  Damn spot on.