Neurological symptoms, secondary to benzo withdrawal

[Rafterman]

I posted earlier about experiencing "tolerance withdrawals" while using C-Pam for a 12 year period. My symptoms were primarily neurological, in nature. Plenty of "brain zaps". That feeling of electrical current that you feel popping and snapping in your head. Way worse when you move your eyes from left to right. I also have dealt with auditory hallucinations from time to time. Those just sound like a bang, or a quick, loud yell. The thing with them is that they can really because a nuisance because there is absolutely nothing you can do about them. Can't cover your ears...the sounds are coming from inside your head. Both things are pretty commonly seen during conventional benzo withdrawal. I think that I was pretty lucky because I have seen people have a much harder go of it when withdrawing..even when withdrawing from a long-actor like C-Pam. What have been your experiences when withdrawing from benzo's? Anyone else get those neurological disturbances? Just curious, if you care to share.  Thanks.

[Rafterman]

Hey Rafterman, I try to cut back and take days off the benzos as the fear of that heightened sense of anxiety cuts like a knife, so I try to take 3 days off or so every now and then. 
Sometimes it is like every little noise is amplified, I find myself jumping to noises, or no noises before my brain can even register there has been a noise. (If that makes any sense) 

Every sense slowly gets heightened, Its like I can see every blade of grass as I walk through the park. 

Although I have been introduced to benzo since 2008, I have twice been managed off the medication successfully firstly in 2012, took a two month period, social anxiety came flooding back in (I was then put back on them) 

The second time, I found it so much easier 2014, they were literally chasing me around with a dose to keep in line with my tapper, but I did not want it.

I have mentioned it before I am sure, but I was told by a consultant Psychiatrist that taking the odd day off or a couple of days, causes a disruption in the brain, resulting in the second time I came off them being so much easier. 
He mentioned long-term users who take them every day at exact same times ( like vitamins ) will find it harder as the brain has to kick-start its own.......whatever it kick starts ( I have limited knowledge)  when withdrawing. 

So I would imagine Neurological symptoms would be a lot worse in 2014, had I not tried to disrupt a regular pattern of taking a daily dose, as I experienced in 2012, with shocks and flinches, lip trembles. 

The roundabout continues as I have been put back on them, a prefered state as my quality of life is much better having the little blue friend to rely on when I am shell-shocked.

Thanks, Slipmat, I definitely hear you. What you describe is similar to what used to happen to me if I miss a couple of doses in a row. In fact, it's exactly how you describe it. Sounds like you were right on the verge of going over to auditory hallucinations. The biggest problem with tolerance withdrawal, like I was having, is that you are thrown into full blown withdrawal symptoms without actually withdrawing. No chance to taper or do a conventional withdrawal. What you recommend is best (the short breaks), but I have gotten to the point when even one missed dose makes the fireworks begin in my head. I already have major health issues, so sleeping is a chore. Add in those exploding head symptoms, and sleep is hard to come by. I am blessed in the fact that only a tiny uptick in dosage cleared things for now. It may clear things forever because I was able to stay on the original dose (which was a small one) for 12 years. That is unusual. Would like to be off all together but, for right now, had to settle for this way. I think the two reasons my doc went along with it is that I am still on such a small dose, and also because I have grave medical issues and he doesn't foresee me living out a normal length life. Ironically, that fact is actually working in my favor when it comes to a situation like this. Anyway, thanks again.

---

Rafterman, may I ask how much Clonazepam you took daily? Mine was a fairly easy taper after about 12 years on the med. I am at a new Farm with less stress and that has helped, but know I find myself back in a fairly stressful place and have upped my dose which is a shame as I was almost there, even forgot my daily morning dose several times and the day went fine. Experienced no symptoms described above? My max dose when really abusing was 2mg or a bit more. How are things now if I might ask? Best To You Friend, and thanks slipmat for an excellent-informative post. Best Wishes FF

Hey FF,
I was only taking .50/d for 12 years. I used to take .25 at bedtime, and the other .25 before eating breakfast. I have seen C-Pam scripted a thousand times and my dose is about as low as it goes. Now at .75/d. Even the nearly 2MG that you took when abusing it is not really that excessive. I have seen doctor's write for 12-15MG/d in people using it for seizure disorder. I know that you don't have seizure disorder, but I am sure that you get my point. Don't ask me how those people stayed awake and functioned at that dose, because I have no idea. If you taper easily from it, probably not all that bad if you had to return under stressful condition and it's great that you never got the neurological symptom's in the 12 years on it. Sounds like you tolerate the med well, that it is effective for you, and that you can go on and off with relative ease. That is great. Regards, RM

[OldBoy]

I posted earlier about experiencing "tolerance withdrawals" while using C-Pam for a 12 year period. My symptoms were primarily neurological, in nature. Plenty of "brain zaps". That feeling of electrical current that you feel popping and snapping in your head. Way worse when you move your eyes from left to right. I also have dealt with auditory hallucinations from time to time. Those just sound like a bang, or a quick, loud yell. The thing with them is that they can really because a nuisance because there is absolutely nothing you can do about them. Can't cover your ears...the sounds are coming from inside your head. Both things are pretty commonly seen during conventional benzo withdrawal. I think that I was pretty lucky because I have seen people have a much harder go of it when withdrawing..even when withdrawing from a long-actor like C-Pam. What have been your experiences when withdrawing from benzo's? Anyone else get those neurological disturbances? Just curious, if you care to share.  Thanks.

Good evening Rafterman,

"Neurological disturbances" is a very kind way to put these symptoms.  Granted, my seventeen years of prescribed @lprazol@m (1mg, 2x / day (for two years), then 1mg, 3x / day for fifteen years) was necessary due to the severity of my GAD, but by the time I found that longer lasting meds such as di@zep@m and clon@zep@m were readily available and commonly prescribed, my psychiatrist was dead set against changing my meds.  Ironically, he had no compunction about leaving me to fend for myself "cold turkey" when my insurance went the way of my employment, even going so far as to hand me a brochure with his prices for non-insured patients and asking me to make an appointment with his receptionist.  When I explained that I planned to spend every penny I could spare on making mortgage payments and keeping basic utilities on, given I had (and have, until the DOL starts making abysmal UI payments on a weekly basis) no income whatsoever, his response (loosely quoted, this was in mid-September 2017 and my brain cells aren't what they used to be) was "Well, you have ten minutes left for your scheduled appointment, you could use it to try to convince me to write you @tiv@n, di@zep@m, or clon@zepam, but you'll just be wasting your time and mine, I don't prescribe those."

The "zaps" started around my fifth day of "cold turkey" withdrawal from @lpr@zolam, and on my ninth day, I was paralyzed by fear of going in public, drenched with sweat, hands shaking, and experiencing a very painful headache on the left rear of my head.  I called the psychiatrist's office and spoke to a different doctor who had quite obviously read my dictionary-sized charts (my former doctor was on vacation, skiing in Austria) to explain the symptoms I was experiencing and the many years I had been prescribed the same medication.  With no sympathy at all in his voice he told me that neither he nor my doctor believed in the Ashton method for tapering, and that if I would like to try a taper with @lpr@zolam, I could come to the office, pay $250 out of pocket for an office visit, and $15 each for three gradually reduced dosages.

Furious (at myself as much as anyone else, I didn't anticipate expenses past keeping the mortgage paid and the taxes paid), I went to the garage, removed a new mailbox post and mailbox, some white paint, rollers, brushes, and stencils (for painting my house number on the finished post), retrieved the post hole digger from the back yard, and dug around the old post to remove it, then used the post hole digger to make a nice, deep slot for the new post.

That's all I remember until I woke up in an ambulance with an EMT asking me a series of questions.  Even that memory is hazy, as is my memory of sitting in an ER waiting room for what seemed like forever.  I don't remember much of that first day and night in the ICU, but the second day is quite vivid, the attending neurologist told me they had done a blood screen to find out if there were any drugs in my system, and behold, the all-purpose "benzo" red flag popped up.  Nonplussed, I gave him my psychiatrist's phone number so that he could verify I'd only been @lpr@zol@m-free for two weeks.  Oh, they ran the entire gamut of tests, from EEG to brain MRI, and found nothing, all the while I was trying to explain to them that I'd been cut loose from a medication known to cause seizures during withdrawal, with no taper whatsoever, and though I think I caught a disapproving look from the neurologist, I wasn't sure if it was directed at me or at my psychiatrist.

In any event, after three days and nights of blood tests and various other pricks and pokes they decided to release me, and here's the kicker.  The neurologist told me he'd like to start me on g@b@pentin, and since I'd never heard of it before, I asked how it worked and how much it cost.  Again, upon discovering that I had no income, he lost interest and told me to "pick up some Valerian Root or St. John's Wort."

A week later I received a monstrously large bill from the neurologist's office, which I promptly tore to sheds and threw in the trash.

I still get "zaps" almost daily, and I haven't touched an @alpr@zol@m in almost two months.  I often lose my bearings when getting out of bed in the morning or rising too rapidly from a chair, and the cursed GAD, and its associated panic attacks, are worse than they've ever been.  I'm fielding telephone interviews for employment opportunities, but I dread the first offer for an in-person interview, terrified I'll have a seizure during a round-robin series.

I'm dead-set against starting an @lpr@zol@m regime again, having been off of it for this long, I think it would be foolhardy to start it again, knowing what the consequences might be.  The irony is that before I was put on that short-acting medication, I was prescribed 10mg V@lium once daily (taken in the evening at 6PM, and it lasted just fine until the following evening at the same time).

My bad luck I suppose, there are not many doctors remaining who prescribe V@lium, although twenty years of medical records confirm a diagnosis of severe GAD and panic attacks.  Perhaps when I find a new job with decent health insurance the selection of doctors available to me will broaden, but in the meantime, living alone in terror of having a seizure and not being found for goodness knows how long is disconcerting, so here I am.

On edit for IceWizard, Mad Max, and Charon: It is 12:25AM on Saturday, November 25, I promise not to post more than four more times in the next 24 hours ;-)

[Rafterman]

I posted earlier about experiencing "tolerance withdrawals" while using C-Pam for a 12 year period. My symptoms were primarily neurological, in nature. Plenty of "brain zaps". That feeling of electrical current that you feel popping and snapping in your head. Way worse when you move your eyes from left to right. I also have dealt with auditory hallucinations from time to time. Those just sound like a bang, or a quick, loud yell. The thing with them is that they can really because a nuisance because there is absolutely nothing you can do about them. Can't cover your ears...the sounds are coming from inside your head. Both things are pretty commonly seen during conventional benzo withdrawal. I think that I was pretty lucky because I have seen people have a much harder go of it when withdrawing..even when withdrawing from a long-actor like C-Pam. What have been your experiences when withdrawing from benzo's? Anyone else get those neurological disturbances? Just curious, if you care to share.  Thanks.

Good evening Rafterman,

"Neurological disturbances" is a very kind way to put these symptoms.  Granted, my seventeen years of prescribed @lprazol@m (1mg, 2x / day (for two years), then 1mg, 3x / day for fifteen years) was necessary due to the severity of my GAD, but by the time I found that longer lasting meds such as di@zep@m and clon@zep@m were readily available and commonly prescribed, my psychiatrist was dead set against changing my meds.  Ironically, he had no compunction about leaving me to fend for myself "cold turkey" when my insurance went the way of my employment, even going so far as to hand me a brochure with his prices for non-insured patients and asking me to make an appointment with his receptionist.  When I explained that I planned to spend every penny I could spare on making mortgage payments and keeping basic utilities on, given I had (and have, until the DOL starts making abysmal UI payments on a weekly basis) no income whatsoever, his response (loosely quoted, this was in mid-September 2017 and my brain cells aren't what they used to be) was "Well, you have ten minutes left for your scheduled appointment, you could use it to try to convince me to write you @tiv@n, di@zep@m, or clon@zepam, but you'll just be wasting your time and mine, I don't prescribe those."

The "zaps" started around my fifth day of "cold turkey" withdrawal from @lpr@zolam, and on my ninth day, I was paralyzed by fear of going in public, drenched with sweat, hands shaking, and experiencing a very painful headache on the left rear of my head.  I called the psychiatrist's office and spoke to a different doctor who had quite obviously read my dictionary-sized charts (my former doctor was on vacation, skiing in Austria) to explain the symptoms I was experiencing and the many years I had been prescribed the same medication.  With no sympathy at all in his voice he told me that neither he nor my doctor believed in the Ashton method for tapering, and that if I would like to try a taper with @lpr@zolam, I could come to the office, pay $250 out of pocket for an office visit, and $15 each for three gradually reduced dosages.

Furious (at myself as much as anyone else, I didn't anticipate expenses past keeping the mortgage paid and the taxes paid), I went to the garage, removed a new mailbox post and mailbox, some white paint, rollers, brushes, and stencils (for painting my house number on the finished post), retrieved the post hole digger from the back yard, and dug around the old post to remove it, then used the post hole digger to make a nice, deep slot for the new post.

That's all I remember until I woke up in an ambulance with an EMT asking me a series of questions.  Even that memory is hazy, as is my memory of sitting in an ER waiting room for what seemed like forever.  I don't remember much of that first day and night in the ICU, but the second day is quite vivid, the attending neurologist told me they had done a blood screen to find out if there were any drugs in my system, and behold, the all-purpose "benzo" red flag popped up.  Nonplussed, I gave him my psychiatrist's phone number so that he could verify I'd only been @lpr@zol@m-free for two weeks.  Oh, they ran the entire gamut of tests, from EEG to brain MRI, and found nothing, all the while I was trying to explain to them that I'd been cut loose from a medication known to cause seizures during withdrawal, with no taper whatsoever, and though I think I caught a disapproving look from the neurologist, I wasn't sure if it was directed at me or at my psychiatrist.

In any event, after three days and nights of blood tests and various other pricks and pokes they decided to release me, and here's the kicker.  The neurologist told me he'd like to start me on g@b@pentin, and since I'd never heard of it before, I asked how it worked and how much it cost.  Again, upon discovering that I had no income, he lost interest and told me to "pick up some Valerian Root or St. John's Wort."

A week later I received a monstrously large bill from the neurologist's office, which I promptly tore to sheds and threw in the trash.

I still get "zaps" almost daily, and I haven't touched an @alpr@zol@m in almost two months.  I often lose my bearings when getting out of bed in the morning or rising too rapidly from a chair, and the cursed GAD, and its associated panic attacks, are worse than they've ever been.  I'm fielding telephone interviews for employment opportunities, but I dread the first offer for an in-person interview, terrified I'll have a seizure during a round-robin series.

I'm dead-set against starting an @lpr@zol@m regime again, having been off of it for this long, I think it would be foolhardy to start it again, knowing what the consequences might be.  The irony is that before I was put on that short-acting medication, I was prescribed 10mg V@lium once daily (taken in the evening at 6PM, and it lasted just fine until the following evening at the same time).

My bad luck I suppose, there are not many doctors remaining who prescribe V@lium, although twenty years of medical records confirm a diagnosis of severe GAD and panic attacks.  Perhaps when I find a new job with decent health insurance the selection of doctors available to me will broaden, but in the meantime, living alone in terror of having a seizure and not being found for goodness knows how long is disconcerting, so here I am.

On edit for IceWizard, Mad Max, and Charon: It is 12:25AM on Saturday, November 25, I promise not to post more than four more times in the next 24 hours ;-)

OldBoy, Thank you so very much for sharing that. I cannot tell you how much I feel for you in that situation. You may know that I was a psychotherapist for nearly 30 years and that I also suffer from GAD and many of the things that you are also dealing with. Over the years, the prescribing doc's (I had no ability to prescribe controlled substances) whom I worked with would sometimes turn client's down for benzo's, ask them to taper, etc. It was agony watching what they went through. They were much in the same boat as you are. Fear of seizing was a primary concern of theirs, as it is of mine to this day. I always feel right on the edge of it. I had seizure disorder when I was a child. It was classified a vasovagal syncope back then, but 5 abnormal EEG's later, the dx was corrected. I know very well the feeling of an oncoming seizure. I have been blessed not to have any daytime one's, but I am certain when I have had them while sleeping. I am not talking about sleep paralysis, but a full blown seizure beginning while asleep. I have also had syncope beginning while asleep. And night terror's since childhood. Year's ago I read an article that said these symptom's occur because of a misplacement of certain protein's in the brain and that it's not something to be taken lightly (except by the assembly line medicine doc's who just want to get you out of their office's and out of their lives). It actually said that 80% (yes, 80%) of those suffering from such symptom's go on to eventually develop neuron wasting diseases. Just like clockwork, I was dx'ed with motor-neuron disease last year. I don't meant to scare you, other neuron wasting diseases are can be FAR less severe than MND and some won't occur until a person is elderly. Some won't occur at all. I am just telling you this to put an exclamation mark on what you were saying about neuro's not taking these issue's seriously. I know that you are under a post limit, but please post back to me when appropriate and let me know more. I would like to help think of some possible solution. Regards, RM